Poetry

Elton Camp


Elton Camp

Elton Camp, 2 february 2012

The Best Possible Candidate for President

 
By Elton Camp
 
The Democrats know exactly who their man will be
Although what the Republicans will do remains to see
 
But a simple fact that both them may well need to face
Neither of them has put the best possible one in the race
 
There is one who has known both poverty and riches
And what can come to one who gets in and pitches
 
And to all types of people this one is able to relate
And few, if any, hold any prejudice of any hate
 
This candidate is a person neither too young or old
And makes own decisions, not doing as is told
 
Another qualification is a history of job creation
That has helped many people throughout the nation
 
Not a single hint of scandal has there ever been
Though the press has watched since way back when
 
The original mate has never, ever been dumped
So that someone younger then can be humped
 
This person’s intelligence is extremely high
Giving judgment as to the right things to try
 
Foreign heads of countries absolutely wouldn’t dare
To try to deceive one who is proven honest and fair
 
The image of the USA would dramatically rise
If this person should gain the presidential prize
 
And just who is this fabulous person you say?
Just take a close look down Tennessee way
 
There is one who has well earned her fame
Find out that Miss Dolly Parton is her name
 
(I’m pretty sure she isn’t interested in being president, but she’s a person I honestly admire.  As she says, she isn’t blonde and she isn’t dumb.)


number of comments: 0 | rating: 7 | detail

Elton Camp

Elton Camp, 1 february 2012

They Are Recalling WHAT!

 
By Elton Camp
 
Most car recalls are not a big deal
We’re still safe behind the wheel
 
Even food recalls are usually okay
If the food was cooked the right way
 
But it really comes as quite a whack
If they want your pacemaker back
 
Likewise, if it’s your artificial joint
That to a defect they should point
 
Now the latest recall that I do hear
Errors in birth control pills they fear
 
So if you took the pills like they say,
May learn you’re pregnant one day
 
They admit the pills made the wrong way
Were distributed throughout the U.S.A.
 
I wonder if Pfizer will take the baby too
Or exactly what it is they propose to do
 


number of comments: 0 | rating: 5 | detail

Elton Camp

Elton Camp, 1 february 2012

Each To His Own Taste

Each to His Own Taste
 
By Elton Camp
 
For eating raw meat I surely don’t care
But I have some friends who order it rare
 
There are some who simply adore pate
I refuse to eat food produced that way
 
To many, sushi is a gourmet’s delight
But I can hardly abide it within my sight
 
Way over in China, it’s dogs that they eat
And some greedily devour chicken feet
 
Some folks taste runs to eating of veal
I find a cow’s little calf too hard to steal
 
Others, over chitlins, will just have a fit
I can’t eat something that smells like shit
 
Pickled hog feet I often see in the store
That’s another that I absolutely abhor
 
The meat market sells pig’s tails and ears
That I’d vomit, suh fare bring on fears
 
And I hear there are people who eat rat
And even skin and cook a fleabag cat
 
“Each to his own taste,” the man did vow
As he tenderly kissed his old milk cow
 


number of comments: 0 | rating: 12 | detail

Elton Camp

Elton Camp, 1 february 2012

Going Shopping with the Wife

Going Shopping With the Wife
 
By Elton Camp
 
There’s nothing like going to the mall
Oh my, how much longer can she stall
 
How many more dresses can she try on
And how much longer can she be gone
 
Husbands gather at the food court & sit
It won’t do a bit of good to have a fit
 
After an outfit the wife does choose
She must have matching purse & shoes
 
And then the husband must assume
She’s selecting a new brand of perfume
 
Then she’ll stay at the cosmetics a while
To her spouse, it is such a tiresome trial
 
What he needed he bought right away
It surely didn’t take him half the day
 
When she goes to the bathroom, no doubt
It will never be like him:  quick in and out
 
When the shopping ordeal is finally through
It’s a day spent in a way the hubby does rue


number of comments: 0 | rating: 8 | detail


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