HarleaQuinn66, 30 grudnia 2011
As I sit here
Waiting for something to happen
I feel my thoughts drift towards you
I think about how you smile at me
How you laugh with me
I think about our code-like conversations on Facebook
About how we talk of breakfast and T.V. shows
I think about how I'm dying to tell you
That I wrote these poems for you
I think about how you'll react
'You should just tell him' my friends say
But what would I say?
I think about the events that led me to you
What if I had done something differently?
Maybe it would've been better
If we never met...
Because then
I wouldn't have to sit and think about you
Written: 9/24/11
HarleaQuinn66, 30 grudnia 2011
He talked about dying today
And he said I would've probably laughed
If he did die
I giggled at the fake joke
Just to amuse him
But inside I was crying
He talked about passing away
As if it was no big deal
And a little part of my heart broke
I can't imagine what life would be like
What I would be like
If he wasn't here
It brings silent tears to my eyes
And loud knives to my heart
Just thinking about it
I wish he knew
That if he died
I would die with him
Written: 9/26/11
HarleaQuinn66, 30 grudnia 2011
I listen to song after song about love
And I can feel the tears rise in my eyes
For they all remind me of you
And how you don't notice me...
I cry these notes for you
I want you
I need you
Here in my life
And I cry harder
Because I know
That it'll never happen
Written: 9/25/11
HarleaQuinn66, 29 grudnia 2011
'I'm never going back...'
These are the words I said
To my most trusted friend
He enever knew that it was a lie
I never knew it was a lie...
You broke my heart
So many times in the past
And yet
I keep going back to you
Running at full force
Only to be hurt again...
I hurt myself because of you
I couldn't speak without crying
I couldn't look at you without my heart breaking
I avoided everyone
For they all reminded me of you
They knew something was wrong
But they never bothered to ask
I was always wondering to myself:
'How can someone be so cruel?'
'How can someone hurt this much
Without meaning to?'
I couldn't stand it
Everytime my head hit my pillow
The tears would fall
Soaking me to the bone
The hurt
And the lies
I wrote them all down
But it didn't help...
So I turned to the knife...
And watched the blood spill
'Oh God...'
I thought
What have I done?
What have YOU done?
Why are you doing this to me?
Why am I doing this to me?
I let myself become this monster
Only with your help
But then...
I realized
That you're not worth it
At least that's what I thought...
But little did I know
That you're worth all of it
For I have gone back to you
To your lies
Eventually this will kill me
But hopefully...
You would never let that happen
Because
Hopefully...
You will love me like I love you
So much that it hurts everyday
Written: 11/14/11
HarleaQuinn66, 29 grudnia 2011
I don't get guys.
I don't get how all of them can be so oblivious to what ACTUALLY matters.
Not just looks.
I don't get how they can do nothing, and everything at the same time.
I don't get how they can hurt someone so much without even knowing it.
I don't get how they can make everyone fall for them without even trying...
And I don't get ME.
I don't get how I'm so, so stupid for actually THINKING that any guy (especially HIM) could ever like me back.
I don't get how I can let myself feel this way.
He's an ass for what he did to me.
No one deserves to be hurt lke this...
And I especially don't get why I'm crying...
Written: 10/?/11
HarleaQuinn66, 29 grudnia 2011
Now you're over her
And as far as I'm concerned,
There is no 'other' girl
Or is there?
You've been asking me
If I'll wait for you
You've been hanging around me
More often than usual
You've been asking who I like
And if there is another boy
You smile and laugh at my jokes
But that's nothing new
Even so...
It still makes me smile
I'm starting to believe
That these signs
Are more than what they seem
Please, please prove me right
Written: 11/1/11
HarleaQuinn66, 27 grudnia 2011
I'm your closest friend
And...
I LOVE YOU!
...To bad I'll never be able to tell you...
P.S. I just want to say: I hate you for hurting me like this
Written: 11/14/11
HarleaQuinn66, 27 grudnia 2011
'Either he really likes you
Or he's leading you on like a dick'
Words I can't get out of my head
I'm so confused
By all of it
By you...
I confused about what I'm feeling
Do I love you?
Do you love me?
You sure are acting like it...
Why can't you be one person?
Why do you have to change?
Why did I have to fall for you?
I'm so confused...
I hate you for this...
'Why is everything so confusing?
Maybe I'm just out of my mind'
Lyrics that speak truth to me
I wish you would be truthful
And not smother me
With these lies
I'm confused by all of it
I just wish I could disappear
And make it all go away
Written: 11/14/11
HarleaQuinn66, 27 grudnia 2011
Of course I had to fall
And fall harder than ever
I might add
Of course you led me on
Because that's what you always do:
LIE
And of course I believed it
Because I like to think
The impossible can happen
Of course...
Of course I let this get to me
Beacause I'm in love
With your lies
Of course you like HER
I mean, she's 'hot'
So why wouldn't you?
Of course you don't like ME
Why would you?
It's not like I care (so much) for you
Of course...
Of course I'm crying!
You hurt me
And I'll never forgive you...
Witten: 11/4/11
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